Happy New Year everyone!

Alcoholics are amazing at saying “I’m done” and not meaning it.  Or at least, not being able to stick to it.  New Year’s resolutions are a time when almost everyone in the world gets to know a tiny bit of what it feels like to be an alcoholic.

Even though I’ve been sober for over three years, I’m still not the best at sticking to things.  I make a lot of promises to myself.  I set goals, usually in times of sadness or loneliness, and those goals slip through me fingers when I find something good on TV or a friend invites me to lunch.  My desire to be better, different, more, (or in the case of my weight, less) hasn’t manifested into a great deal of action.  Unless, does whining count as action?

So I might be up to my eyeballs in things I want, plans I have, but I’m only making two resolutions.  First, I want to read one book a month.  I was having lunch with a friend before Christmas and she told me how she tries to read one book a month.  She has three children and another on the way, and honestly, it made me feel incredibly lazy.  Surely, if she can find the time, then I, with far less responsibility and fewer people demanding my time, I can manage to finish a book a month that isn’t meant for teenagers or a trashy romance novel.  I have until February 1st to finish Terry Goodkind’s Stone of Tears.  It’s like a million pages.  Maybe it could count for February too?

I haven’t decided on my second resolution.  I want to wait and see what presents itself as most important.  So I resolve to make a resolution.

Slowly, ever so slowly.

(3 Years, 3 Months, and 14 Days Sober)